I know you don’t mean to hurt me with your decision to follow through with Air Force. I guess the hurt just comes with it. You don’t leave until tomorrow night and I already miss you incredibly. The reality of it all hits me at the moments where the electricity between us is thick and the world seems to fall silent. You’re leaving and I have no idea when we can finally be together like this.
I will miss it all, the way you ask me to make you tomato sandwiches, you stopping at my job on the way home to bring me lunch, shopping and picking out things for you, how we typically end up at walmart every night, the way your hair smells after its washed, the architecture of your back and its tattoos by the bare light coming through my window, sleeping in until our body clocks wake us, your STUPID iphone obsession, late night showers while everyone in my house is asleep, True Blood marathons, movie nights, conversations about nothing, and everything in between.
I am willing to endure any amount of pain to continue this right where we left off. So for now, its one of our major obstacles that we have to get over and I’m fine with that. You’ll be home for Christmas, my love. I love you.
I guess I’m proud of cooking a full meal for the first time in my life on my own, surviving a rib tattoo, being able to say I can successfully cure xbox 360’s of the red rings of death, and getting on top of my California checklist.
- Sell my Camaro back home before I leave which I really don’t want to part with, but have to.
- Transfer Pacsun stores to one of my choice in the LA area, which I also don’t want to do. I’m not ready to be “the new kid” again and work my way up in respect and rank. But I’m also not ready to throw away 2 years with the company when I could possibly intern in the future for them.
- Finalize all LA plans. This includes the house/apartment, packing up my things here, shipping things to the new place, getting my new car up in California, registering at my school campus and getting my classes and stuff settled. Basically all this stressful shit for my new life that starts with college.
- Settle everything before I leave the island. Saying goodbyes and all those messy things that will really kill me. Leaving my home and everything I’ve known for my whole life..
- And lastly, be able to watch my girlfriend get onto a plane and begin her service to the United States Air Force in exactly one week. I won’t see her until at least December unless I fly out to San Antonio, Texas for her graduation. As if this doesn’t make planning for California harder on me.
For a local band’s EP in Kapolei today. 2 straight guys overemphasizing “sexy” as what they wanted us 6 girls to think as we modeled with them. 6 girls for an EP titled SEVEN, wtf. Very awkward shoot as one of them kept brushing my thighs between shots and being flirty with all of us. Hopefully the shots come out decent.
DOPE AS FUCK. That shit was gorgeous all lit up on the harbor at 2 AM. Security was insane and the whole opposite side of the street was the behind the scenes stuff, completely lit and alive. Seriously, a fucking amazing site. Wish I could have seen the cast though.
Recently, my niece went to Oregon to visit my grandma. I thought these were the cute and hilarious. Her first time seeing and interacting with a squirrel looks epic. If you knew her, you’d laugh at what a little diva she is.
1. I’m not named after anything in particular, my mom mixed letters from her and my dad’s names, N-A from Nathan, S-E from Shallene and just added R-A to make it sound okay.
2. I am OBSESSED with 410BC. I have a completed skate deck I skate, another deck on my wall, along with 2 paintings of their prints they don’t even make, one of the first copies of their coffee table book (first printing), stickers/ads I made in high school, and too many tees.
3. I have a scar that looks like a vampire bite from an old hip piercing.
4. I wanted to be an elementary school teacher until I was like 11.
5. I’m quite convinced The Time Traveler’s Wife is the best novel I’ve read.
6. I was a cheerleader for 2 years.
7. My first celebrity crush I can remember was the pink ranger in the original Power Rangers, go figure.
8. I hate people, but work in retail.
9. LOVE gore. Faces of death, mondo films, etc etc.
10. I’ve had stretched ears since I was 13. Don’t fucking mess.
11. My dad was a professional bodybuilder before he hurt his back 2 years ago, winning every title on the island.
12. Hate chocolate cake and ice cream, love chocolate.
13. I’m a total video game nerd. Especially shooters.